Dreams & Delusions…

Posts tagged “Depression

Internal Dialogue

We all say-

“I love too hard”

“I fell too hard”

“I’m too sensitive”

“Too intense”

“Too emotional”

“Too damaged”

“Too dramatic”

“Too different”

“Too anxious”

“Too timid”

“Too bold”

When what we mean is-

“I am willing to sacrifice for love”

“I believed in them”

“I have a strong intuition”

“I do not hide from emotion”

“I am willing to express emotion”

“I have been hurt, I know how to heal”

“I feel intensely”

“I know who I am”

“I desire safety”

“I dislike too much attention”

“I am not afraid to express myself”

When will we stop feeling “too”,

And start feeling “enough”…?

~Antanya


Just Maybe.

‚ÄčMaybe I’m a vessel

For emptiness,
Maybe I’m programmed
For loneliness,
Maybe I’m screaming
Inside the silence…

~Antanya


Death’s Dark Devotion

The blood seeps through the page,
Eternal flood that transcends age…
Soul in an armored cage,
Hole in my heart, melancholy rage…
The sanguine comfort of death
Softly whispers, “I Love You…”
With its last ragged breath…


Disconnected

Estranged, disconnected, severed:
Floating past the unknown-
Soul shivers in the cold,
When eyes slide past me,
Can’t help feeling alone.

~Antanya


In the Worst Way

I’ve always had some
Kind of awkward loneliness
About me-
People smile and hug me,
But seldom do they truly touch
My core, my soul.
Why is it that the ones who do
Are never comfortable
With staying so close?
Don’t you see-
How your presence comforts me?
But, then you are pulling away,
And I’m alone,
Lonely, in the worst way.
While you run away,
Off to your life-
Forever on the edge of mine.

~Antanya


Mirrored Walls

You keep digging, what do you think you’ll find?
If you won’t let me in, you won’t know my mind.
You think you know, but all you see are my mirrored walls.
I refuse to open up when you can’t hear my spirit’s calls…
If you keep pushing, I’ll piss you off. I’m programmed to offend.
Unless you try to help, to understand, my mind will only defend.
Give me a reason to trust you, if you want to see deep inside…
I don’t let just anyone in the dark cave where my demons hide.

~Antanya