Dreams & Delusions…

Posts tagged “Deep Within

Stoic Storm

Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
Don’t scream
Or struggle,
Or he won’t stop.
Let him get bored…
Be boring,
Stoic.
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
Don’t say how
You feel
Or he will
Scream again,
Don’t communicate
So you can have
Peace.
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
You can’t change
The choices she makes,
Tell her you’re worried,
But not where he can hear…
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
He will think
You’re weak,
So just take it,
It will be over soon.
He will say it was
Nothing.
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
And sometimes,
You remember
Harsh voices,
Unwanted hands,
Threats and violence.
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
And you scrape
Your pieces into a pile,
Breathe…
Pick them up
And hold them to your chest…
Breathe…
Mourn for the girl
Who used to be,
The one who hides
Within you still…
Breathe…
Love,
Heal,
Remember,
And Breathe…
Don’t react,
Just breathe…

~Antanya


Complex Paradox

When you feel so far,
When your words
Don’t seem real
When your glance slides away,
I feel small and unremarkable,
Disappointing and empty.

When you are not here,
When the dark
Feels so deep,
When I feel so much I can’t say,
I long to show you and be stripped
Of this panic,
This need and desire…
To be swept away.

I try to focus
On my life,
On everything I have
And am grateful for,
But, you are always
Distracting in my periphery…
Endlessly addictive and sensual,
Teasing treaturously.

Your distance is a paradox,
Leaves me in wonderment,
Of an adoration so complex…

~Antanya


4:00 AM

4:00 AM, awake again…
I know why.
I close my eyes,
And it’s like…
I can feel your heat against my thighs,
Can you hear my whispers and sighs?
Do you feel my fingertips,
Your soul embracing mine…
Our hearts intertwine,
The deepest bliss, for you, to find-
Over and over again in my mind…

~Antanya


You in Me

I meditate
On love,
Light,
Healing…
I try to be
The best I can be.
The more I
Self-actualize,
The more I
Realize…
You are
An indelible part
Of me,
The more conscious
I become,
The more precious
You are to me.
The more I realize
I’m blind,
The more I see
The pieces of you I find
Hidden, deep within me.

~Antanya