Dreams & Delusions…

Posts tagged “Communication

Stoic Storm

Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
Don’t scream
Or struggle,
Or he won’t stop.
Let him get bored…
Be boring,
Stoic.
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
Don’t say how
You feel
Or he will
Scream again,
Don’t communicate
So you can have
Peace.
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
You can’t change
The choices she makes,
Tell her you’re worried,
But not where he can hear…
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
He will think
You’re weak,
So just take it,
It will be over soon.
He will say it was
Nothing.
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
And sometimes,
You remember
Harsh voices,
Unwanted hands,
Threats and violence.
Breathe,
Don’t react,
Just breathe…
And you scrape
Your pieces into a pile,
Breathe…
Pick them up
And hold them to your chest…
Breathe…
Mourn for the girl
Who used to be,
The one who hides
Within you still…
Breathe…
Love,
Heal,
Remember,
And Breathe…
Don’t react,
Just breathe…

~Antanya


Complex Paradox

When you feel so far,
When your words
Don’t seem real
When your glance slides away,
I feel small and unremarkable,
Disappointing and empty.

When you are not here,
When the dark
Feels so deep,
When I feel so much I can’t say,
I long to show you and be stripped
Of this panic,
This need and desire…
To be swept away.

I try to focus
On my life,
On everything I have
And am grateful for,
But, you are always
Distracting in my periphery…
Endlessly addictive and sensual,
Teasing treaturously.

Your distance is a paradox,
Leaves me in wonderment,
Of an adoration so complex…

~Antanya


Internal Dialogue

We all say-

“I love too hard”

“I fell too hard”

“I’m too sensitive”

“Too intense”

“Too emotional”

“Too damaged”

“Too dramatic”

“Too different”

“Too anxious”

“Too timid”

“Too bold”

When what we mean is-

“I am willing to sacrifice for love”

“I believed in them”

“I have a strong intuition”

“I do not hide from emotion”

“I am willing to express emotion”

“I have been hurt, I know how to heal”

“I feel intensely”

“I know who I am”

“I desire safety”

“I dislike too much attention”

“I am not afraid to express myself”

When will we stop feeling “too”,

And start feeling “enough”…?

~Antanya


Please…

Tell me.
Tell me how.
Tell me how to be with you.
Show me.
Show me now.
Show me now that you want me.
I do.
I do see.
I do see you reaching out for me.
I will.
I will love.
I will love you the way we both need.
First, I need you to-
Tell me.
Show me.

~Antanya