Grateful
It’s funny.
You can love your life
And all the people in it,
And still feel hurt and sad.
I am grateful for all
I have, all I’ve felt,
And all there is to come.
Every experience
Is an opportunity
To learn, to heal,
To love, to feel…
~Antanya
Delusion/Clarity
I love myself,
And I don’t feel
Lonely…
I start to feel
Like I can function,
Like I have healed…
Then my subconscious
Sabotages me.
I dream all sorts
Of strange and mesmerizing
Dreams,
And they are all about you…
When I wake,
I am devastated.
I do not sob and whimper
Like I used to,
But my heart aches,
My head hurts,
My body throbs…
Like the day you told me
You did not love me,
That I was a stranger,
When I thought…
I thought you,
You were the only one who saw
Me…
I love myself,
And I don’t feel
Lonely…
I miss you
And the delusion
That you loved me.
~Antanya
