Dreams & Delusions…


It’s happening again…
My mind is shutting me in.
The need to express
Grows to excess,
As I long to heal
The you-shaped hole
In my chest.
And I’m so exhausted,
I can’t seem to rest…
But my mind keeps screaming
That what my heart feels
Is not real,
How is that possible,
When it’s the way I feel?
I’m not sure if it’s weakness
Or impossible strength
That keeps me
Riding this wavelength…
I hate being bound by doubt,
But if I can’t speak,
There is no way out.
Will there be a day
When we can love
Without walking away?
I’ve been trying for years,
And I’d struggle through many more
To destroy these fears, to validate these tears…
To heal with the one I’ll always love and adore.


11 responses

  1. I know this feeling 😦

    January 28, 2015 at 10:57 am

  2. I don’t like it… 😦

    January 28, 2015 at 11:07 am

  3. Annie B

    Powerful, Antanya. So powerful.

    January 28, 2015 at 11:23 am

  4. Lisa

    Why can’t you speak? I feel this way sometimes. 😦

    January 28, 2015 at 12:34 pm

    • There are so many reasons that I can’t pick one. It sucks. 😦

      January 28, 2015 at 12:36 pm

      • Lisa

        I felt that way for so long and it just burned me up. So I stopped holding it in. ❤

        January 28, 2015 at 12:38 pm

      • That’s why I’m here… ❤

        January 28, 2015 at 12:38 pm

      • Lisa

        You can’t help who you love, you know? No one, even ourselves, can tell our hearts who to love. I have learned that the hard way. Hugs!

        January 28, 2015 at 12:41 pm

      • I know, and that knowledge is both comforting and stinging to me. *Hugs*

        January 28, 2015 at 12:50 pm

      • Lisa

        You have to let the flood loose. It’s the only way.

        January 28, 2015 at 12:52 pm

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