Dreams & Delusions…

Hurting Internally

There is a cold, dark place in me
Sometimes a prison, sometimes a sanctuary
When I feel close to opening up,
I run back there and seal the door shut
I don’t do this consciously, but I recognize
The pattern, helping along my demise
I need you to know how I feel
But, I’m caught in doubt, is this real?
The life I chose does not allow me
To have you more than internally
There have been so many damn times
I have typed so many painful lines
Only to delete before I could send
It terrifies me to think of an end
Where you never really knew
Just how much I truly love you…
But, when you’re in pain, It hurts me, too.
(…And hurting you is something I wish I’d never do.)

~Antanya

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One response

  1. littleannab

    Reblogged this on Little Anna B (Anna Bianca) .

    December 17, 2014 at 2:24 pm

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