Dreams & Delusions…

My Confusion

I‘m not sure how to feel anymore…
Sad, knowing you may not return to my heart,
Joyful, knowing you are happy,
I don‘t know how to conquer this confusion…

One second I feel like breaking down,
The next I feel blessed for all I have,
I don’t know whether I should scream, cry, run, or hide…

Inside I feel like it’s not over,
But my mind tells me it should be,
I don’t know how to handle this…

One day I’m fine, and it seems I can carry on,
The next I feel unstable and broken, like a table missing a leg,
I don’t know how to block you out…

Sometimes I wish I could take it back,
But somehow I know my love is permanent,
I don’t know how to let you go…

I used to be so sure I was complete,
Now I feel something missing when we don’t talk,
I don’t know what’s wrong with me…

I am standing now,
But I feel the floor crumbling beneath my feet,
I don’t know how to be stable…

Defeated no longer,
But slave to my own feelings,
I don’t know how to be myself…

My judgment tells me to move on,
But my heart cries for more,
I just don’t know anymore…

I have lived for too long in the service of others,
Time for me to take care of myself,
You don’t know how you’ve helped me…

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